So, our business meeting this morning was bright and very spring-like. Even the ground was dry underfoot for a change and it was the first time in months that I’d left the green wellies behind!
Diggers was trying out his new harness (fluorescent orange - he is such a trend setter! ) and it was even a little loose, so cutting down on those gravy bones a little is clearly beginning to show dividends.
Diggers was in a particularly ‘barking’ frame of mind this morning and not into engaging with me and the matters arising. Barking at every dog that went by, but more notably barking at distant barks of dogs far away. I’ve long wondered about this, having been a big fan of the book 101 Dalmations when I was a child, I’ve always liked to believe the ‘twilight barking’ network really exists. I watch him, the distant bark of dogs and he stops dead in his tracks, front paw paused and head cocked on one side with one ear up. He sniffs the air as if decoding or considering the message and then barks his reply. Good old fashioned communication. I left him to catch up.
As we walk on it gets me thinking more about how we communicate now. Not through phone calls and ‘over-the-garden-wall’ chats, but through the world of Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat……. I could go on. ...It’s instant and wide ranging and suddenly we become ‘experts’ in any number of debates and subjects. Everybody has an opinion (which is everyone’s right) but then the ‘#hate’ sets in if other people share a different opinion…..
As a Counsellor I often see the negative side of social media and what it can do to people. I understand how rumours or untruths can spread and influence people quickly without being in receipt of the facts ( ‘It must be true, I read it on social media’’) Judge and jury in an instant.
I see depression and anxiety that develops from social media inferiority - the perfect lives portrayed that people worry about not having. The perfect image, the perfect family life, the implied material things that people start to benchmark against and compare themselves to.
Don’t get me wrong. Social media has lots of good points. It is instant, we have a connection at the press of a button and it can help people in many ways. But, that main benefit is also the main drawback….. It’s instant. We post in a knee jerk reaction, taking very little time to consider actions or implications.
If Diggers had been present with me in this morning’s meeting I would have said….
Well, It’s like this Diggers, take social media for what it is, just another line of communication. Don’t believe everything you see or hear on it to the extent that it makes you feel inadequate or unworthy. Don’t become fixated on it. Do you really need an account on every platform? Not only can that create extra anxiety for social media inferiority, but it can also add to added anxiety of keeping up with it all and posting etc which takes you away from the here and now. Use it as a tool. Spend some time ‘decluttering your feed’ - only hear from the people you want to hear from, only see the posts you want to see. Remember, you are always in control.
There is a quote not intended for my topic today but, in my opinion is a good approach to social media……
‘Happiness is not a matter of intensity, but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony’. - Thomas Merton
